Tuesday, September 25, 2012


Have you heard that many Olympic athletes use "VISUALIZATION" as part of their regular training regimen? Its a true story. Google it. Visualization is key to becoming the skater you want to be. You want to be a speedy jammer? Then you better visualize yourself AS a speedy jammer. If you want to juke like ping pong ball on the track? Then you outta be visualizing yourself popping all over the place.

I have tried it. It works. I have seen it work in others.

There is a problem. I CAN NOT FOCUS.... I get so distracted that I find it hard to meditate - visualize - squirrel. I have such a hard time with doing this on my own that I have had to find little tricks to help me out. If you are like me then you might find some of these helpful and fun. You can also do #5 & #6 as team bonding stuff to and visualize for the whole team... WAY AWESOOOOME!

Here are my 7 tips...

For my work computer I have to use about 10 different systems that all require passwords. I have changed them all to be something positive. Something that helps me redirect my focus to my goals. It's easy. Example: "Go to the gym today!" can become g02gym2d@y!  That is a pretty secure password... Awesome! It reminds me to go to the gym! yes OR you could be more like "I am a fast jammer" can become imaF@stJmr

#2 - CHANGE THE BACKGROUND ON YOUR PHONE - make the background on your phone a picture of you doing what your goal is. Photo shop if you have to. Every time you look at your phone you will see your goal. It's an easy way to see you as the way you want to be.

#3 - CHANGE YOUR SCREEN SAVER AND BACKGROUND ON COMPUTER - I have just changed both the background on my work computer and the screen saver to a bunch of photos of me playing banked track, the better ones. I want to visualize myself as a fast, strong, agile, HAPPY banked track skater. This will help me when I try out for Tilted Thunder on Oct 27th. Make sure you pick the better pics, you don't need to put them all up. Just the ones that are going to help you not hinder you. Don't pick photos of you F-ing up or falling or what ever bad thing.

If you have not DONE what your goal is yet, example, if I had not played any banked bouts yet I could put photos of my favorite banked track skaters and photoshop myself in there or put a close up myself between each banked track skater photo so that I see myself on that track and associate myself with my goal.

#4 - MAKE YOUR OWN GUIDED MEDITATION - true story - I use the recorder on my iPhone to make myself guided meditations. I talk about my goals and what I want to achieve and I play it back to myself with my eyes closed and try to SEE in my minds eye what I am telling myself. Sound crazy? So what. Try it before you knock it. And I have a pretty voice. So it's cool.

#5 - MAKE A VISION BOARD - it's kinda like a collage - you can use glue sticks and glitter and bring out your inner 8 year old. Cut out pictures of your goal and key words. Glue them all together and make it pretty and fun. Then hang it somewhere that you are going to see it every day. Add to it when you need to. Have fun with it.

#6 - MAKE A GOAL SHRINE - dedicate a top of a dresser or a shelf somewhere to your goal. Put there fun pictures that represent your goal. On my desk at work I have all my trophies. I keep them at work because I am there more than anywhere else. By the trophies I place other things that represent my goal. A new skate wheel. The color of the team I want to be one. The size I want to be when I hit my goal weight. It's there for me to look at all the time. YIPPEEEEEEEEEEEEEEE There it is!!! IT'S A SIX!!!

#7 - SHUT YOUR FRIGGIN EYES AND BE QUIET - when you lay down to sleep at night and shut your eyes, JUST TRY for a bit to tune out the day. SEE yourself in your minds eye achieving your derby goal. TELL yourself you are doing what ever it is you want to be doing. If you want to be able to hit while skating backwards SEE YOURSELF doing that... then say over and over."I can skate backwards and hit. I am effective. I am swift. I am agile. I am strong. I can skate backwards and hit. I can transition. I can! I can! I can!" Even if you can only do it for a few minutes before you zone out and are picking out shoes in your brain or planning a trip or wonder what color to dye your hair or what ever you move on to think about, that's okay too. The more you try it, the easier it becomes and if you have the other things around your house that you have seen over and over it will be easier for you to see the goal in your minds eye...

There are other things you can do - these are just some of the things I like to do. Try new things and do what works for you. Do something you can stick with... HAHAHAHA

Ya right. I can't stick with anything, yet I repeat everything. I read a lot of stuff, well, I start a LOT of books and I skim a lot of articles on line and the underlying message I see over and over is that you REAP WHAT YOU SOW, you become what you believe, YOU CREATE YOUR OWN FUTURE, your thoughts become your reality... ON AND ON AND ON...

These are just some of the things I do. I don't always reach my goals but I reach more goals than if I never tried anything. I sometimes reach a goal then stop doing what I am doing that got me there and fall back (weight loss, house cleaning, bills, etc) and I have to start over. Each time I learn a little more. Life is in fact about the journey right? What if I achieved all my goals and was bored because I had nothing left to strive for???

As with derby, as with life... the victory may be sweet, but the fight is often sweeter.

Or is it, without a fight the victory is less sweet?
If you didn't work for it, is it yours?

Um, ya, that's deep, sorry if I got to deep for anyone... Sparkle. Sparkle. Gum drop.

No go shut your eyes and get to work!

Wednesday, September 19, 2012

Betty Ford Ga-owl-axy

Betty Ford Ga-owl-axy.

Those are my fans! They love me!
Robot Sharpener is like "Heeey BFG!!! Heeeeeeay!"

Flashlight Cat thinks... "OMBFG! That's really her!"
 But he is too freaked out to look at her.

Yup, I won those! Those my bling b**ches!

Andy Warhol, eat your heart out.

Weeeeeeee! I am swimming in DERBY!


Owl is well.

The end.

Thursday, September 13, 2012

The BFG ODDyssey

It's dark. The only sound is the tinnitus that constantly rings in my ears and the gentle hum of the engines on the Mother Ship. Making me painfully aware I am alive, yet alone. My only companion the reflection of myself in the porthole glass.

The journey is on.

As I look out the windows of the craft I am in awe of the beautiful planets dancing in the galaxy. A slow and repetitive dance of life. Spinning, circling, gliding. The same path over and over. The circle of life? The mundane existence of consistency? It is still beautiful - and I watch.

Each planet represents a chapter in my life. Each as story. Some happy, some sad, I think of childhood friends and the dreams we had. Funny how life imitates art. Songs and stories from the past become realities in our present. Each reality unique to our own perception.

As the ship sails past I see my happy yet odd childhood years, the early 20s which for all extensive purposes were a bit bland, the dark decade of debacle and debauchery and then sobriety and the need for all things extreme as if sobriety wasn't extreme enough.

My gaze lingers on each planet a while. Reliving each moment with innocent fondness, enjoying my past and in gentle awe of how these moments are the framework for my present. The lifeblood and essence of the being I am right now in this moment. So many moments. So many reflections.

As the planets slip away I am reminded that I am on a journey. Not a journey down memory lane but a vast voyage, an extraordinary expedition to a new and fulfilling future. The planets are beautiful and I am filled with joy as the inhabitants of them wave to me, they smile, fond memories of the people in my past. As we pass I am not to be saddened by their departures but to embrace the love and/or knowledge gained from knowing them. Not always both were obtained, sometimes love, sometimes knowledge, sometimes both. One questions not the origin of learning if the learning serves a purpose. Wisdom comes from many sources. It is for me to keep my eyes open to receive the wisdom, keep my soul adjusted to comprehend the wisdom and keep my heart open so I am able to appreciate the wisdom, regardless of the source. Sometimes despite the source.

The most recent planets are so vivid and clear yet at the same time so distant and conjure emotions yet to be dealt with. A swirling sea of decisions and actions. How strange to see and feel such a myriad of truth about myself. The wisdom of these most recent planets yet to seep into my heart. To my knowing. How the adventures on these planets will play out in my future is yet a story to be told. I wonder where the ship is heading. Where will these planets guide me to. The decisions of my most recent life changes are jumping around inside my head. Clouding the path in front of me. Or is it a path at all? This uncharted wilderness of space and time I call my future? What have I done? Where am I headed? How can I go on?

There is a small whisper from behind me. I am not alone after all. I never was. My co-pilot smiles in the darkness. I can't see Him, but I know He is there. I feel the smile in my heart. Because I love you with SMILES.

The ship, the Co-Pilot and I drift on, toward the uncharted planets of the galaxy that is my future and though I am not fully aware of where I am headed I am at peace with where I am at.

A final thought to all my friends... No matter where this journey takes me, no matter where I stop, no matter what my face is painted like, always remember, I love you with SMILES.

And enjoy your journey.